Sorry It’s been so long since I’ve made a post, but a lot has happened. I’m now in Washington, USA. Moved back to America but in a completely new/foreign place to me, so the past couple of weeks have been a bit of a learning curve and I also didn’t have a computer (laptop) so I couldn’t really do much.
Anyway, I want to start working more on oikisama so I’m going to start by posting some stuff I already have ready, and I’m going to start with this.
Some swag advice for Reading with Kindle
Here’s a little AJATT tip I’ve got for anyone out there doing immersion based learning and uses a Kindle.
If you are a visual type of person or would rather just watch the video (which I probably would suggest. Then click the link above, or press play on the embedded video :3)
YO send on the tip fam.
Alright Alright, I gotchu bruv
So when you’re reading on Kindle, by default, a number of things show up on the screen.
Normally at the top is the time, then at the bottom right you got the percent.
and finally on the left you have either line count or time left to finish either the book or the chapter.
Somethin like this
Now of course you can change this to whatever you want, and even turn them all off so that they won’t show up on the screen anymore.
Whiiiich, is actually what I would recommend you to do and is the main idea of this tip.
Alright so lissen ye
Make your Kindle look like this:
Why shouldn’t you leave all the other shit on your screen?
Well to put it shortly…
You see, In psychology there’s a state of mind called the “Flow State”
I’m sure you’ve heard of it.
The flow state is when you’re so impeccably focused on what you’re doing that everything else seems to disappear and you become fully immersed in what you’re doing.
What the hell does that have to do with reading on my Kindle?
Well, its simple.
In my personal belief when you have the time sticking up on the top, the percent on the bottom right, and the line count/how long you have left to finish the book/chapter on the bottom left, you put your self in a situation where its very hard to stay focused, and therefor nearly impossible to get into the “flow state”
Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t the only reason, but I believe this is a very important and useful thing to realise.
If you’ve ever had the experience of being in the “flow state” you know that you seem to almost forget about time completely and the next thing you know however many hours have passed and you didn’t even realize it.
So by that same logic, the more distractions you have around you (and yes, the time is a distraction), the less likely you are going to get into this “flow” state.
Why do you want to be in the “flow state”
Because its fuckin awesome.
Ever had a time when you felt so productive, so active, so focused and determined, that you actually felt satisfied and happy with yourself?
Well, that’s what happens when you get in this Flow State.
Not to mention, your efficiency and also the quality of the activity you’re participating in (in this case, reading) , might as well have been duplicated, because that’s what it feels like.
If you watch/watched the video you’d know. But I reference a time where I was in the flow state while reading.
I was sat outside having a cup of tea reading this book I was really into about lucid dreaming called 無敵の明晰夢
and I was listening to this album from this Japanese instrumental artists whom I really like :
3 hours had gone by and I had finished reading the entire book.
Albeit I had already read maybe 20 % or something before I started reading, but still. Within a few hours (without me realizing it at all) I had finished the entire book in one sitting. Why? Because I was able to enter the state of Flow and maintain that state due to the little to no distractions that I allowed my self.
You don’t need to know the time.
Think about it, if you’re really interested in something and want to fully indulge yourself in it (in this case, reading), why look at the clock?
All its going to do is make you conscious of how long you’ve reading, and it’s going to make you dwell the activity as a whole.
Stop setting goals for your self
I don’t know if you’re anything like me, but if you are. Then you might use the percent at the bottom right :
to set imaginary goals for yourself while you’re reading.
what I used to do all the time was tell my self “okay, I’m not going to stop reading until I get to this percent”, or “5 more % and I’ll be set” or something like this.
In my opinion, this isn’t good.
When you’re reading, or doing anything. The best way to get fully immersed into what you’re doing is to be generally and intrinsically interested in the exact activity you’re participating in.
If you were truly motivated to read/and or (were) actually interested in what you were reading, you don’t need any arbitrary motivation. All you need is the intent.
I want to read, therefore I’m going to read.
I like this book, therefore I’m going to read more.
It’s as simple as this.
Sometimes by setting these arbitrary goals for yourself, you are actually making yourself prone to “burn out” or dislike the sensation of reading, even if you actually LIKE to read.
For example, I would force my self to read 5-10 more % of the book I was reading even though I already felt like I had read a lot and wasn’t really interested/enjoying the time spent reading anymore
Then, even if I was able to meet my goals and finish the extra 5-10% the actual sensation, how I felt whilst I was reading, was complete and utter shit. Not to mention the quality of what I would’ve actually gotten out of that extra 20-30min or so of reading would’ve nearly nothing.
The opposite of this is also true. Sometimes these arbitrary goals can actually be TOO easy, in that, you finish 10% like you had originally sought out to and so you then stopped reading, even if you felt like “oh wait, I could actually read way more”.
All in all, setting goals for your self is only going to make the process much more slow and painful and there’s little to no benefit.
How to turn off the Time/Percent/Line Count etc.
The easy answer:
For turning off the time
If you press the very bottom left of the screen while you’re reading you can filter through all the different options of things to show, and even turn the time off completely (at least on Kindle Paperwhite)
For turning off the time at the top and everything else:
When you’re reading, if you click the top area on the screen you can see
and Icon that looks like this Aa (two A’s)
If you click on that you can go through and change all the settings, including font, size, orientation, and of course, whether to show the time or not.
I know this is a small tip, and some people might even think it’s insignificant or maybe you already realized this and have been reading like this, in which case, good job, but I still figured I should make this as its helped me out and I do think its useful.
I hope you benefited from this in someway shape or form, and I appreciate anyone out there who reads this :))) <3
Hey guys, I know I made a post yesterday explaining all the current shit going on in my life, and also talking about my birthday buuttt, today’s my birthday so I figured I’d make a post. So ye
Shit I got from my girlfriend yuzuuu <3 <3
Twistea swag tea making thing
this thing looks really cool I cant wait to try it. Basically you put tea leefs in it and it makes tea for you instantly. I’ve been really craving some 麦茶 recently especially cuz its summer so I might get some tea leafs when max and I got to london.
she also sent me the letter I mentioned in the last post and it was really sweet… made me tear up a bit, I really do miss her. The best part about getting something from yuzu is smelling her scent, it just brings back so many memories and its such a cute smell… I really do love it 🥺🥺🥺ぴえん
Also she a while ago she bought my perfume (the one I used last time we met) and tried sending it a while back but because it was too much they wouldn’t let her so she had a 200iq idea and got a really tiny spray thing from the dollar store and filled it up and sent me it and it’s so nice. I think I’ll keep rocking this perfume forever its just such a good smell.
lil sharky🥺❤ お揃いのもの
Its this little cute shark pouch you can put shit in. If you wondering why she got me a shark its because (fun fact) my favorite animal is a shark lol. She sprayed her perfume on it too so it smells so good and its so soft 🥺🥺🥺. She has the same one too so its お揃いのもの. I love things where we both have the same thing like clothes or items or what not.
also I took a picture of my self in the morning to kind of “record” how I look now, like as an “adult” lmao or just at 18. So, yeah I’m a stick it here so I can look back years later n’ shit idk lol. My hairs kinda pulled back behind my headphones but wheatever lol
Badass 18 y/o Luke chan
Going to London tomorrow
idk really know what else to say, I’m pretty excited. Going to London tomorrow and then the day after tomorrow I have the appointment at the American embassy. Watched some videos of some Japanese people walking around London n’ shit trying to find more fun stuff to do while we’re there. Anyway I’ll update more soon. Thanks for reading :0 :3
Hows it going guys, I know I haven’t posted anything in a while but I have been working on the site here and there and I am STILL working on my massive “I’m in the UK” post which I literally started the day day after arriving in the UK (the 23rd of April). Idk, it’s just such a big post I get overwhelmed at times and it’s hard to stay motivated while writing, but I do know that once it’s done it will be a really swag post and if someone out there decides to read it all from top to bottom they definitely won’t regret it…*wink wink* ;).
Anyway, I figure instead of just leaving you guys hanging, (if there’s anyone reading these anyway lol), I’d make a post talking about very recent things going on in my life. So yeah, lets just get right into it :3
Yup, the time has finally come. Well, actually as of the time writing this post It’s technically tomorrow, my birthday. My birthday, if any of u are curious (send jp books if ur swag, lol jk), is July 7th. 7/7. Hella swag ultra lucky numbers 😉 because I’m cool, yes. It’s actually a holiday in Japan called 七夕[tanabata] (Jpnz wikipedia if ur interested)
七夕【tanabata】 Star Festival
Basically: (copied from English wikipedia cuz I’m lazy)
Tanabata (Japanese: たなばた or 七夕, meaning “Evening of the seventh”), also known as the Star Festival (星祭り, Hoshi matsuri), is a Japanese festival originating from the Chinese Qixi Festival.[a][b] It celebrates the meeting of the deities Orihime and Hikoboshi (represented by the stars Vega and Altair respectively). According to legend, the Milky Way separates these lovers, and they are allowed to meet only once a year on the seventh day of the seventh lunar month of the lunisolar calendar. The date of Tanabata varies by region of the country, but the first festivities begin on 7 July of the Gregorian calendar. The celebration is held at various days between July and August.
The description of the festival reminds me of me and my girlfriend, two lovers separated that meet once a year (at least for now). Kind of romantic when I think about it.. Anyway, swag lore and seems like a pretty cool holiday. Looking forward to going to one of these festivals when I finally get to Japan.
I’m going to get a little personal here and admit something I don’t really tell anyone. To be honest, for the longest time perhaps since I was maybe 11-12 y/o, I’ve always gotten pretty sad on my birthdays. I don’t really want to get too deep into why but I will shed some light on how I normally feel on my birthdays, especially the past 4 or 5.
What I don’t like about my birthdays
This is really embarrassing/hard to say, but If I’m being honest I don’t really like my birthdays, I normally get kind of well, depressed.. idk, It’s hard to explain, but I think it has to do with my family or lack there of. Sometimes I look at other peoples families and feel sorta jealous. I mean, when someone if their family has a birthday it’s like everyone there to cheer them up and just Idk, a proper “family” if that makes sense. Sometimes I start feeling nostalgic, and start missing certain people and I just feel “alone“.
I also don’t like the concept of having like a special “day” where all of a sudden things are just somehow “different” and people are supposed to treat you different. I remember living with my dad and his girlfriend and I always felt “weird” or like kinda upset when either my dads girlfriend or one of her friends would almost blatantly “act different”, if that makes sense. Like people who maybe wouldn’t normally treat me a certain way just almost completely change their entire demeanor when speaking to me (But only on that day). idk, weird.
Also, I always feel REALLY bad if someone gets me things or like actually genuinely tries to make me feel better and idk be “happy”. It’s weird, most people probably don’t feel like this. I might be broken lol, like a bug in a videogame, except no ones patching my retarded ass lmao. Nah, Idk, but I’d rather people not get me anything like Idk I just feel really bad like they didn’t have to do anything so when/if they do it feels like like, well idk, like I don’t “deserve” it. Not to say I’m not happy or appreciative, it’s the exact opposite I am I just don’t really feel like I deserve it so I just feel “guilty” if someone gets me stuff.
I miss u so much ゆず 🥺❤
Finally, and I guess probably the most painful of them all is the fact I won’t be able to spend my 18th birthday with my girlfriend (yuzu). I know I haven’t really introduced my girlfriend in any of my posts yet but that’s because I plan to make a whole post talking about her and well, us, as she really is the love of my life. Obviously we still talk everyday and and I’m sure we’ll video call and text loads tomorrow and she did send me a birthday present that I haven’t opened yet (but super excited to open tomorrow), but I still can’t deny the fact that I really wish I could be with her right now and of course on my birthday. 😞
That being said, It’s not all bad I mean like I said I still have loads to look forward to tomorrow. Talking to yuzu and reading the letter she sent me, (she said there was two in my present 😳) and she sprayed her 香水 (perfume) on it, the one she used last time I saw her, (probably the best scent I’ve ever smelled EVER) on the letter so I can’t wait 🥰🥰🥰not to mention My best mate Max and I are going to London the day after my birthday (although not only for my birthday), but I’ll get to all of that later in this post.
What makes this birthday “special”
Well, turning 18 actually means, at least in the west, that I am now an “Adult”. Which if you read my post about living alone, you’ll know I think this is kind of bull shit…lol, well, I mean at least in my eyes being an “adult” has more to do with your life experience and how mature you are than your age. Age is completely arbitrary in my opinion, I mean, there are plenty of people I’ve seen that are in there 20’s hell, even 30s that act like children, and on the opposite spectrum there are people in their early teens who are more mature than me lol.
Nonetheless, being 18/ (being considered an Adult), does, open a lot of doors in life. The biggest and most important “doors” it opens for me in particular is *drum role please*…
I can finally get married in Japan!!!! YES BIAATTCH
*insert Jessie from breaking bad pic*
You heard that right, I can finally get married in the J-Land. I’ll get to why this is so exciting for me in a sec but first let me explain a bit. So obviously I’m American and in America land I’m pretty sure in most states you can actually get married as early as 16 (with parents consent) and then when you’re 18 you can get married without anyone consent. However, the land of the rising sun as some wack ass rules for the age you have to be for getting married. Get a load of this:
Article 731 to 737 of the Japanese Civil Code stipulates the following requirements:
The male partner must be 18 years of age or older and the female partner must be 16 years of age or older.
A person who is under 20 years of age cannot get married in Japan without a parent’s approval.
Most people related by blood, by adoption or through other marriages cannot get married in Japan.
Obviously the parts about not being able to marry your sister n’ shit make sense to me. But what I think most people including my self will think is “weird”, is the fact that the girl can get married at 16, but the guy has to be 18. like は？
I’m sure they have their typical “Japanese Logic” for this too but as you can probably tell, this is what I’m talking about when I say “Finally” when talking about being able to get married in Japan.
Ur boi’s gettin married 結婚しますっ！！！
I realize that this is probably a shock to anyone who just came to the site/doesn’t know me too well, but I I think I’m going to save the “why” for another post. Perhaps the post where I talk about yuzu (my gf) and our relationship. Regardless, I will say, yuzu and I have been wanting to get married since I was 16. We started dating in 2018 So roughly a year after dating, and meeting for the first time we started talking about it and It’s been something we’ve wanted to do for over 2 years now. Not just getting married of course, we want to create a family together. But like I said, that’s for another post. What I’m trying to get at is well, this birthday is quite important because it means yuzu and I can finally get married and as a bonus (a really swag bonus) getting to Japan, (and maybe even fairly soon) is now a feasible plan.
Finally going to Japan?!
Here’s where things start getting really exciting. So unless you’re living under some rock, you probably know that Japan has its borders closed to well, basically, anyone right now. Unless, you have some “special circumstances” (and even then you have to apply for a visa before going to Japan). So basically up until pretty recently yuzu and I were both pretty down. I mean, the borders have been closed now for over a year and a half and things just seem to be getting worse and worse with the pigs ruling the world making stuff worse every day. Nonetheless, one of these “special circumstances” that I was referring to just a second ago is basically if you have a Japanese spouse/kid, or Japanese family living in Japan, you fall under these “special” circumstances. Which honestly I’m surprised they even let you get away with being with your family anymore.
Anyway, I’ve known this since pretty much the time they first shut the borders and so the plan was always to get in the country under these “circumstances”, obviously originally the plan was to get into japan with the 短期間 (short-term) visa , and then get married in Japan and then switching to the spouse visa to start working and what not. But, obviously that’s not going to happen anytime soon, and isn’t a feasible plan anymore. So now we are rolling with plan B, as mentioned before. The problem with plan B is well, we didn’t think it would be possible to get married or if it were we thought she would have to come to America for us to get married and then we would go back to Japan together. But this is when we found out
You can get married in Japan without actually being in Japan
Yes, It’s true. In-fact part of the entire visa (its called 配偶者ビザ) ‘s meaning is that in the case you DO get married while your spouse is outside of Japan (from the perspective of the Japanese person), you can use said visa to actually almost “call” your spouse to Japan. I’ll leave some links at the end of the post to that goes more into detail about it all but yeah. This is great news for us, I mean if all it is paperwork (albeit loads of paperwork cuz its Japan), at least its POSSIBLE. That’s the important thing.
So basically if we get married (which we’ve wanted to do anyway), we can apply for a specific visa called the haiguusha visa (配偶者) /Spousal visa which, by the way, is the best visa you can have. It basically puts you on the same playing field as a Japanese person in that you can work at any job, go to school etc. Also once you renew it the second time you can apply for 永住権 which is basically permanent residency. All sounds really good, and it probably is, or can be. But, first step first, we need to get married.
Getting the paperwork
We are both in the process of getting all the paperwork, I will say the Japanese person generally has to do way more work than the foreign spouse. That being said, there’s still quite a lot I have to do, the biggest of them all and really the most important is whats called:
Affidavit of Competency to Marry | 婚姻要件具備証明書
This is basically a piece of paper that says you can get married in your own country and there is no problems. Its an Affidavit so basically you write all your information and then you swear by it and say its all true and then have it notarized. In my case, it’s a little complicated because I’m American and normally you would do this type of thing well, IN America. But, since I’m in the UK right now my only option is to do it at the American Embassy in the UK which is London. London is really far from where I currently reside, I live in a really small city called Ripon in North Yorkshire, basically the northern part of the UK, London is probably a 5 hour car drive from where I’m at but you wouldn’t drive. Here’s a picture to describe how far it is.
as you can see, quite far. But, since it’s either travel a few hours and get there or literally go back to America (fuck that), I’d rather just go to London.
Going to London ロンドン行くぜ！！
Max and I actually were planning on going to London from even before I came to the UK. We always talked about how if I was going to the UK I’d have to go London at least once. It’s like one of those “once in a life time” experiences, and it would make no sense to come all the way to the UK and not go to London at least once. We were also planning on going in July anyway because the weather is nicer during summer.
It just works out because we already planned on going to London in July and now I have an actual “reason” to go other than just 遊び. So basically I had to talk to talk to this person from the American Embassy in London via email and I told him my situation and even though apparently they closed all routine notary appointments he’s making an exception for me so I can go there to get the affidavit.
The shitty thing is that even when I get the shit notarized at the embassy, because it has to be signed by a US consulate I will have to send it to a consulate in America probably in the state i was born in, have it signed, then have it sent back to me so I can then send it to Japan… yes, quite the trip this piece of paper is going on. Either way I’m still excited especially because my boy max and I will have a good time in London once we’re there.
6 Days ６日間
So we’ve decided to stay 5 nights and stay 6 days. We are going on the 8th of this month (july) so the day after tomorrow (as of the time writing this). So from the 8th to the 13th. 6 days. We chose this time because its the full time max has off thanks to his vacation days, and also it’s based around my notary appointment at the embassy on friday (the 9th)
The thing is with the notary appointment is that the only time they can see me is 11am in the morning, no later. And since obviously it would be impossible to take a bus and train to London from where I am so early so to arrive by 11am we are going to need to go the day before so we can get to the appointment early in the morning. So the first day is mainly just to get there, get settled into our hotel and what not. Then the next day is the American embassy shit (shouldn’t take too long). Then from that the rest is just exploring and sight seeing.
Small list of shit we made of things we want to do/places we want to see/go to in London
-Get Japanese books/Go to big Japanese book store/Weeeb store
So it turns out theres like no Japanese book stores or like stores that sell Japanese books even in London except one and its kind of hidden, Max and I had to do quite some digging just to find this place and apparently its like a scavenger hunt just to find it, but basically under this department store theres this massive Japanese book store called “JP books” and its notorious for being one of the biggest Japanese book stores in all of Europe. From what we know here’s the address/how to get there.
JP books below mitsukoshi department store on 14-20 Lower Regent St, London
Take pictures, go to the top all that shit
-Order food in Japanese at a Japanese restaurant.
yeeeee. Im sure there will be some Japanese ppl in london and I really wanna try speaking in Japanese to someone other than my gf lol
-China town in London
street food, take loads of pictures. Eat 1 time at proper authentic Chinese restaurant.
-National history museum (and other free museums as well)
Take pictures, see cool shit
-Go to skyscraper or some shit and look down at all the peasants of the world
where I’m from in Florida theres not many tall buildings and this is always something I’ve wanted to do
Apparently it looks swag at night so yeee
Massive Ferris wheel
another cool park ( I think )
in conclusion, yes, I’m tired. It’s about 11:30 when I’m writing this and Max and I just spent loads of time looking for hotels and train tickets and I’m kind of sleepy not gonna lie, I’m sure there’s more things I could add to this post but I’m gonna cut it short here and publish it because I’d rather have something out so ye. this is basically what’s been on my mind recently and I hope you enjoyed reading and if you did maybe, just maybe? make an account and comment on the post letting me know what you thought of it.
The most badass Japanese film I’ve watched (so far)
Whats up guys, today I’m going to try and make a post a little different then what I’ve done so far on this site but actually more what you’d expect from me. This post is about a Japanese film I just discovered and finished watching today, probably the most badass Japanese film I’ve seen.
How I found it
I actually found this film randomly by listening to this rap song from this artist I found on YouTube quite recently.
Here’s the song
As you can tell, quite a bop. That besides the point, it was actually a comment saying where the picture was from and that’s how I found the name of the film.
I then, naturally, looked the film up as I was interested (cuz it looked badass) and read the Wikipedia for it in Japanese. I thought it sounded really good so I searched for a torrent for it as its quite an old film, and boom, found one. And of course because I’m swag I will link to that torrent that I found so that by the time you finish reading this post if you’re interested you can watch the movie as well. Oh, and also a link to stream it. One thing though, unfortunately I couldn’t find a raw version of the movie. They all seem to have hard subs on them (and the subtitles suck) but if you open it with something like VLC you can easily crop it so you can’t see the subtitles. Either way, don’t let that stop you from watching this movie because its amazing.
So basically I’m gonna summarize this film in my own words as simply and as short possible and hopefully it gets you interested.
A girl named Yuki is born to seek revenge on 4 distinct people who basically killed her father and raped and tortured her mother. She is the embodiment of revenge and her sole purpose in life is to find and kill these swindlers who destroyed her family.
So there it is, that’s my very brief description of the movie. I hope you find that intriguing enough to give it a watch for yourself. It was a swag movie, and very aesthetic with some really cool scenes. I really enjoyed it.
YO whats up guys! I’m so happy to finally make another post in what feels like forever, and let me first start by just saying, I am so terribly sorry, AGAIN, I always get either too busy or too LAZY to update my website/ write posts. I’m SORRY ;-;
[Wrote First Day In The UK] Anyways, before I really get into this giant topic, I just want to say its currently 1:20 am when I’m writing this and I’d normally never write this late at night but as of yesterday morning I am currently in the UK. Its honestly crazy, but, I’ll explain everything very soon so just buckle up because its quite a long story how I got here.
[Note] I first started writing this post literally the day after arriving in the UK (as you can see by the text above), so April, 24th, however, due to partially having a lot on my plate, but also just getting used to my new life in the UK and just hanging out with Max making swag memories etc, I’ve pushed this post off for quite a while, as of now nearly a month and a half already. There is good reason for this though, I really want this post to be quality and I want it to be as detailed as possible without being borderline boring whilst I explain my current situation and also my plans for the future. I should mention, this post is going to be LONG. I mean, I’m literally going to be going over everything from before I even got to the UK, what I’ve been doing, etc. That being said I hope this post can clear things up and give some insight as to where I am in my life right now and what I intend on doing.
[Update 2021/07/29] It’s now been over 3 months since I’ve came to the UK. I still haven’t finished this post due to a variety of reasons. Lot’s of things have happened both good and bad since the last time I updated this post. I’ve realized that I definitely shouldn’t have tried to make this all into one massive post. It’s just too much. That being said, I can’t really stop, I’ve already invested all this time into this post and I want to finish it. At the time of writing this, plans have changed quite drastically. I think what I will most likely do is finish the post but unlike before finish the rest of the post without nearly as much of the detail. Then, once I’m settled I can start making individual posts about specific major events since, well, coming to the UK. Some ideas I have: post about me and Max’s time in London, Post about leeds, Post about knaresborough, post about York etc. Anyway, if this post is too long and overwhelming don’t worry, I totally get that . That being said, I’m still going to finish it as it is (one big post), partly just for memories and to be able to look back later on in my life.
Update 2021/07/30 so I’ve decided I’m actually going to split this post up into different parts within the same post by using page breaks and that way I can publish already finished parts until the full post is complete. I think I’ll split the post up based off of each part. So part 1 will be page 1.
Just in case you wanted to skip through this post because I will admit it is kind of long, I’ve added some anchors so that you can skip through bits and pieces. HOWEVER, I encourage you to read the WHOLE post from start to finish as that, well… would make me the happiest :3
Part 5 Arriving in the UK (First Month) | Endless quarantine | inexplicable Hospitability
Part 1 Why
How in the absolute ふぁっく did I get here.
Well, this is a long story.. well not really, but kind of… Obviously if you didn’t know much about me and all you understood about me was the very little that I have decided to put up on the site you wouldn’t really understand how the hell things ended up the way they have (at least for now).
So obviously my “plan” or goals or “dream”, has always been to move to Japan live with my girlfriend and to have a family together, and if you’ve read the bits and pieces I’ve put up on the website you’d know that my original plan was to move to Japan THIS year, in-fact, NOW, in April. I had this whole plan in my mind as Japan at that time and for many months up until a certain point were saying they would have the borders open for foreigners traveling to Japan through some new “special” system that they would’ve created to help let foreigners enter the country. Up until oh idk, maybe a few months ago? Japan was pretty stuck on this date (well not a specific date but just April). Andddddd, you guessed it, they fucked me over again. Well, not just me obviously, everybody. I could go on an entire rant to be honest about Japan and their wishy washy behavior with this bs “pandemic” but I digress, regardless, as you’d expect they not only still have the borders closed, Japan basically bum fucked everyone planning on going to Japan virtually any time soon, I mean seriously, hosting the Olympics and yet cancelling foreign spectators??? Ugh, pisses me off just thinking about it. But yeah, Japan was closed. So, what do I do? I mean obviously its a dream crusher in it of itself for me not to be able to go to Japan despite waiting as long as I have, but on top of everything else, my lease for the place I was staying at for the past 6 months was ending in April, a.k.a, I had until the end of April to basically get the hell outta dodge.
This was a really hard time for me, in many ways. The thought that this thing I planned for for months, invested money and time in, and was the main thing keeping me positive and motivated to work hard for, just, flops.. I was pretty depressed.. REALLY depressed, not to mention some personal issues with me and my gf and her family at the time just over all this, STUFF. I don’t want to get to far into the personal stuff but when I say I was depressed lets just say I mean it.
This is where Max comes in
I don’t know if you guys know Max, I won’t do a huge introduction for him considering I’m sure he’ll make his own post where he introduces himself some time in the future. Nonetheless, Max is my best friend, he’s the greatest friend I’ve ever had and one of those truly “gem” like people that you look back and think “thank god I met this person”. He is my 兄貴, ya know, in anime n’ shit you got like your protagonist and then there’s the older brother type of figure and Max is like that for me. Anyway, me and Max have pretty much always talked everyday since the time we’ve met each other nearly a year ago now. He knew my situation, knew how hard it was and how little options I really had, or at least, “good” options and told his parents about the whole situation and I guess just in general he would speak about me to his parents and stuff and I remember even at the time thinking they must be pretty good people considering the stuff he told me about them. Anyway, he told them about my situation and I guess they must’ve felt really bad for me and wanted to help me and they did the very generous and kind act of opening up their home to me. I’ll talk about it more later but I am truly lucky to be in the situation I am and to have as good of a friend as Max.
My original plan on moving to Japan in April and finally seeing my girlfriend again was crushed due to the worlds dumbest “pandemic”. And as a result I had to act quick because my 6 month lease at the place I was living at for the first time alone at 17 years old(On Living Alone), was ending by the end of the month. Thankfully at the time my best friend Max essentially came in clutch and suggested I came to the UK and lived with him and his fam until I could get to Japan.
Making Up My Mind
I ended up coming to the conclusion that making a detour to the UK and living with my friend Max until I could get to Japan was my only good option pretty quickly after we had talked it over some. Obviously I didn’t really have the time to plan this out for months (/years), similar to how I had planned my venture to Japan so I just had to roll with it. I knew it was the right thing to do, and honestly I was just getting dragged further and further down into a giant pit of depression in the state that I was in. I mean, constantly working and striving for something only to be met with harsh reality that its not going to happen. Over and over again. At least going to the UK I could prove to my self that I could do it. I could make a leap and I am getting closer, I mean obviously the UK isn’t necessarily close to Japan in the slightest, however, compared to Florida It is quite the leap. 4,000 miles of a leap. Not to mention even if I absolutely hated the UK or if god forbid things didn’t work out so well with Max or his family, I could at least gain very valuable life experience from it. And obviously I wanted to meet my boi Max and have a swag time together so really it is a win win, well, it’s the best option for now.
So there it is. That’s basically “why”, I mean there’s obviously some more fine details but for the most part that’s the gist of it.
Couldn’t you have just stayed where you were?
Also I realize some people might be confused as to why I seem like I “HAD” to go somewhere, like, why couldn’t I just have stayed in Florida? I’m sure some people, especially someone who didn’t quite know me that well might ask such questions.
Well, obviously I only had until the end of April to go somewhere, or possibly start another 6 month lease at the place I was staying. But, I’ll be completely honest, that place was shit. My landlord was a manipulative and deceptive person who took advantage of me based off my young age and lack of experience renting by essentially charging me way too much for way too little. Even then, I could’ve gone somewhere else right? Work some more, find a new place, start a new lease, move in, repeat the same pattern… right? Well…..no, I think somewhere deep down I just wanted to get away. Not just from that shitty room I rented, just from.. well, everything really. My Dad, the people he associated with, even my own friends. I just wanted to “start fresh”. I still do, I hate being complacent in life. Not to mention moving to Japan has been my current active plan for the past 2 years now, especially when my girlfriend went back to Japan, this entire time I’ve been trying to so hard to go only to be held back but one thing or the other. I started doubting MYSELF, thinking somehow it’s MY fault, that I’M not doing enough. I was really depressed. I mean, I was trying my absolute hardest, working 2 jobs at one point to save up money whilst also doing school and trying to maintain my long term relationship with my girlfriend, it just seemed like nothing was enough. Anyway, I’m rambling now. The point is, when Max suggested the idea of me coming to the UK until I could get to Japan, I started getting optimistic again. Thinking, I might not be able to get to Japan yet, but, at least I have SOMETHING to look forward to, something to be happy about.
So comparing my options, 1. Stay right where I was in Florida, working my ass off to no extent (while at the same time being depressed and loosing hope/vision), or 2. Make the leap, go to the UK give living with my best friend a shot and make some good memories whilst also gaining valuable life experience, AND still working hard towards my goals of moving to Japan and being with my girlfriend. Naturally I’m going to go with #2.
Hey Guys, I know I haven’t posted anything in a while and I am truly sorry for that. That besides the point though recently I had a sort of argument/debate/conversation or I don’t even know what you’d call it, in twitter DM’s with a person I won’t mention his name but it was pretty out of the blue when he sent me this, and while I will admit I was offended at a lot of points because he came across a little condescending and it seemed like he was making a lot of crazy leaps in judgement based off a couple posts about my personal life on the site. Anyways, I wanted to make this post because although there was a bit of being a douche on both of our parts there is a lot of good points within these messages in both my message and his. That being said lets just cut to the chase and show you the message
Hey, I just read through some of your site, and had no idea how young you were and how lofty your goals are. I am not much older than you (23), but the small difference between us is an ocean of difference compared to other age ranges. As someone who’s learned Japanese since he was 15, I feel like I almost have a duty to tell you some essential tips on the whole “moving to Japan” thing that might seem obfuscated or difficult when you’re a teenager. The thing I feel like I absolutely must tell you after reading the about section and “plan” section of your website: you absolutely must get a bachelor’s degree.
It will be increasingly hard to get into Japan without one. Your current plan of living with your girlfriend, while admirable, will very likely not work out long term–being 17, feelings change, things happen, life goes on. There’s nothing wrong with this, but you have to understand it’s not a sturdy bridge, so to speak. Without a bachelor’s degree you are basically screwed. It’s like your ticket of entry into the country. I lived there for a year as an exchange student at Waseda University, and I’ll give you some really good advice:
You are still at a point in your life where intense study and hard work can pay off in really sizeable ways. What I recommend you do is look into the School of International Liberal Studies at Waseda. It’s all taught in English, and it’s laughably easy to get a degree. You’ll have a nice four years and a bachelor’s from one of the most respected institutions in the country that will open a million doors for you. Employers may even hire you based on your ties to Waseda alone–this is by far the strongest invisible bond that overlaps all other relations in Japan for seemingly no reason. Then you can seek out basically any job in any field you like. If things go south with your girlfriend, you’ll have a reason and a means to continue to live in Japan.
Currently you live in a dream. I don’t say this because I’m trying to insult you or something, I think it’s very admirable how adamantly you insist on achieving this dream. I wish I was that forward thinking about it at your age. I also wish I had someone who could tell me more specific details about something that seemed so impossible. You have to understand that the way you’re describing moving to Japan and starting a life there is a dream. Especially considering you live essentially a hikikomori’s life, you will not be able to adjust to such a wildly different change in lifestyle quite well. Anyway, the point of this message is to tell you to do extremely well in your last year of school, apply to a Japanese university, and get your degree. Do this while the window is still open, or your ideal life will never be granted (even if you move to Japan trying to find anyone who will hire you when your entire resume is online school and McDonald’s will be almost an impossible task).
Text ver of just message & response ——> Click Here
Before I get to my response a short message.
After reading this message for a third or fourth, (can’t remember now) time, I realise in my response I forget to mention a couple of things. For starters I think part of the reason why we ended up here and why he was almost “forced” to make some of these giant leaps in judgement was simply because the lack of actual explanation of my plans on moving to Japan, (at such an early age). I’ve mentioned it sometimes briefly here and there in some parts of some posts put for the most part I haven’t really went into detail. I think MOST if not all of what he was referring to when he wrote this message to me was the post I made titled “The Plan | Start” where I talk about some of my plans with this website and also with my life, and to be honest, I could see how someone who knows nothing about me just from reading that and understanding my age could think that I am just being incredibly “naive” or “lofty” with my expectations. So I will admit that, that’s kind of on me so to say in that I should’ve expected someone to eventually end up sending me a message like his. That being said, although I don’t think this person had bad intentions or was *intentionally* trying to be a dick, to be honest he really came off to me that way, especially reading his message for the first time. Having someone tell you that you are “living in a dream” besides the point, he almost 勝手に painted a picture of me in his mind that is far from my character in reality and I almost felt the “need” to stand up and protect myself. Also I will mention that because of what I’ve just previously stated, I was pretty offended and therefor my response had a fair share of doucheyness (yes I just created that word), and so understand that if you are reading this and you think “wow thats a bit harsh”, or, “damn dude you’re a dick”, trust me I acknowledge I went a bit too far and said some things I didn’t have to simply because I was “upset”. One last thing, my response includes quite a bit of personal things about me so maybe that might interest you are not, either way try to focus on the core points being brought up because that’s what I think can be taken the most from. Anyways, the response I sent was pretty long and somewhat thought out so no more beating around the bush.
Hey man although I appreciate your advice and your long thought out tweet, like 99% of the things you’ve mentioned I’ve already thought about a thousand times first, my situation isn’t as black and white as “Hey Japan! Sounds cool! Gotta girlfriend there so why I don’t just move over there whipty do”, no. I’ve been planning on moving to Japan since I was fucking 11 anything you can tell me about visas and immigration I’ve probably read up on it and have done more research than you. As far as the me living with my girlfriend, she will be my wife by the time I’ve moved there, we’ve been together for almost 3 years now and have been wanting to get married for a while now, While I’m not saying that lightly like I have some sort of advantage because I have a Japanese girlfriend who I plan on marrying but then again spousal visa is a serious way to bypass the “bachelors degree to jet” path that 90% of gaijin take. Thy being said I DO plan on going to university when I’m in Japan I’ve already decided that I’m going for a scholarship with 文部科学省
(MEXT) that should help with financial situation and also will help me get a degree which will then help me to possibly widen my horizons in terms of companies that will hire me, BUT to be completely honest I don’t even know if I WANT to go that route, I know this is one of those things that you probably don’t get but living a happy life doesn’t mean working your ass off just to get into a decent paying office job at some big company, honestly I’m more interested in freelance translation/interpretation working and programming than I am the other way around. The degree would just be nice to have just like how I plan on taking the JLPT not because I ever intend on using to prove how “good” I am at Japanese but just to have. Also you passively aggressively bash me loads of times in your little book of a message you’ve sent me, you call me a hikikomori (although I somewhat admittedly joked about me being one in one of the posts) that’s not really accurate I also mention I work full time (so clearly not a hikikomori) and I live on my own (pretty much the exact opposite of most hikikomori), but more importantly I guess you attempted to somehow “shit on my dreams” or something buy telling me that I’m “living in a dream” but I can assure you, my life is the farthest thing from a fucking “dream”, yes I can be naive about things and yes I can fantasize (like all of us) but this “plan” that I have is not something new, not something I just pulled out of my ass after fantasizing about going to Japan. I cant even explain to you how much planning and thought has gone into this and I probably wouldn’t want to even if I could because you would just down play it. Honestly from the very beginning of your message you greeted me with a very condescending “I’m better than you so listen to me” attitude and although you continuously preface it with “oh but I admire you and I’m just trying to help” みたいな言い方
at the end of the day what I’m seeing from you is the case of the “I tried the same thing you’re trying to do now when I was your age, failed, and now I’m in my twenties trying to do it again and salty after imagining the idea of someone else succeeding”. look dude, Not everyone’s situation is the same, and trust me if you were giving me actually advice (and not being a condescending dick ) I’d be more than happy to listen and take note, because at the end of the day I AM trying to get to japan, but I also have other goals and ways about doing things and that’s something if you truly did care and want me to succeed you would respect. Also I’m sorry to break this to you but you are an incredibly judgmental and arrogant person, I can understand someone misunderstanding someone based off their age but you don’t know the slightest thing about me man. I am 17, yes, but I am also legally emancipated living on my own and have been since I was 16, I’ve had multiple jobs (not just mcdonalds) and I’ve worked to support my self as an adult whilst everyone else my age was getting high and twiddling their thumbs around doing nothing with their life. when I was 13 I sought out to study Japanese and although at the time I didn’t have any good methods and didn’t know a thing about language acquisition or AJATT or MattVsJapan or anything for that matter, I did what I thought was best did my research and grinded my study every fucking day, and here I am 4 years later with a girlfriend that is the love of my life that If I didn’t speak (and was pretty good at that) wouldn’t even have probably met in the first place. This is just one example.
My entire life I’ve had abusive/shitty parents growing up, everyone around me in similar situations all did the same things, went to drugs, alcohol, basically fucked their lives up. me, I took initiative got out of that shitty situation and decided to start being an adult. I don’t say shit lightly, when I want something I will get it because I will bust my ass off until I do. That being said though considering I’ve had the life I’ve had virtually everything is going to be at least slightly harder for me than others because of the lack of true proper family (which is in my opinion essential for a happy life). The way you talk about getting a degree and going to university to by the way just goes to show that you clearly don’t understand finances and responsibility, like anyone can just go to any university based on their own desire as if tuition costs were not a problem, maybe that’s because YOU didn’t have to worry about that because you fall under that category of people who solely relied on their parents to get anywhere. Anyways I’m on quite a tangent now, I’d like to cover all the points you mentioned because literally all of them are false and its ridiculous how black and white you think my situation is. Lets see, “Even if you move to Japan trying to find anyone who will hire you when your entire resume is online school and McDonalds will be an almost impossible task”, welp for starts, again, incredibly rude and condescending. But that aside the point, I already kind of mentioned this before but my plan isn’t just to move to japan and never go to school or get any sort of degree, like I mentioned before I do plan on going to university (under a scholarship of course) and getting my bachelors (although thats probably the furthest Ill take it), of course in the meantime before I start university in Japan me and my girlfriend would have already been married by then and I will most likely have a part time job saving money here and there and or freelancing work that I can be doing remotely such as translation. Again, I already know what you’re thinking because people like you are so goddamn black and white “oh but you’re just naive, getting married at 18 is dumb you’ll change your mind, trust me ” yada yada, I’ve heard the same shit a thousand times, look, I get it. Hell, I might be naive, but that doesn’t change the fact that this has been what I’ve wanted to do for literally the past 5 years of my life. If it hasn’t changed in 5 years, It’s probably not gonna change in 6 when I proceed with it. And look man, I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt there by saying that yes, the way I have described me moving to Japan and what not there was definitely some fantasizing going on there and not completely accurate, but then again, I’m not stupid. I know what I’m getting myself into, what I wrote in that post is besides the point, my mission of moving to Japan is without a doubt happening and not the way you think it has to. Look I understand that going to university in the us and getting your bachelors degree so you can move to japan under the Jet program and teach a bunch of uninterested kids in English and get paid pretty shit for it is the stereotypical “path to Japan” but you gotta understand there are WAY more ways to do it then that. Japan is actually a pretty difficult place to immigrate to if you’re from the US, trust me I know, the options are definitely sparse but not nonexistent. Also one thing you said, which I’m actually kind of shocked that you phrased it this way because if you’ve read my posts I would imagine the response would be the exact opposite but you said “Then you can seek out basically any job in any field you like. If things go south with your girlfriend, you’ll have a reason and a means to continue to live in Japan.” understandable yes even I have thought about the possibility of things going south with my gf as highly unlikely that is because I am genuinely trying to think of all possible outcomes, but the way you phrase this makes it sound like the only reason I want to live in Japan is my girlfriend, and although being with her and starting a family together is like one of biggest dreams in life
living in Japan is too, regardless a university degree is not the only thing there is too life nor the only thing there is to surviving and living in Japan. Anyways, its just as you said basically, you’re trying to give me advice that doesn’t apply to my situation, it only really applies to you, you even recommend for me to go to the save university that you did. You don’t realise this but by you living in Japan for some period and thinking the way you do now you’ve literally (probably unconsciously) fallen into the community of people who lived in Japan for some short period of time and think they know everything about the country and try to “red-pill” everyone else about it. It’s actually ironic cuz there youtuberes in japan like Tkyosam and Gimmeabreakman (not sure if you are aware of them) but they literally talk/rant about this all the time. Ironically the person who seems the wisest isn’t the one blabbering their mouth about all the details of something claiming to know it all its the person who listens and absorbs and understands there will always be more to learn and appreciate. Also (and again, don’t know why I’m even trying to explain myself to you), but its not just my girlfriend, its her entire family welcoming me there, her and her mom literally MOVED to a new house back in october last year so I could come any time and have a place to live anticipating my arrival, Me and her mom have like a somewhat family like bond too, maybe its because I don’t have too much of a great mother figure or something but I sort of latched on to her and she treats me the same, dude, shes literally given me permission to marry her daughter when I turn 18. You know how rare that is? Not just rare but that just goes to show that this isn’t just some fantasy tale its reality. Anyways at the end of the day there are people who support you and your dreams and people who are jealous or upset because their own efforts in life aren’t going too smooth so they lash out on you, I know I will succeed, why? because I have to. There is no other choice. So just like Japanese, Just like my relationship, just like maturing and becoming self sufficient, and all these other things in my life that I’ve sought out and accomplished I will do the same for my voyage to Japan. Again, only two type of people, the choice is yours. Although I would rather not associate with someone who doesnt support my goals. Anyways man, its getting late. There’s probably more that I wanted to mention but at the same time I already feel like I put way too much time into this and explained way too much to you that honestly is pointless because you didn’t support me from the beginning so its all just going to be overlooked anyways.
Nonetheless I felt the need to stand up for myself and my dreams. Also maybe a bit of advice on my behalf this time, if there’s ever a point in the future where you feel the need to give someone else in a similar but different situation then you, first of all, that’s completely fine, but for starters, please, PLEASE, understand everyone’s situation is different and not this black and white thing where one concept can be applied to like 99.9% of everyone’s life, it can’t. Also, don’t be a condescending little asshole and passive aggressively bash the person whilst somehow somehow giving them “advice” , also if you’re gonna give some advice, give some actual advice, literally in all of what you sent me there was only one real point which was “go to university and get a degree before going to japan otherwise you’re screwed”, which is like the most generic bs advice anyone whos ever looked into going to Japan has heard. Again, not black and white. Anyways dude I wont lie I probably went too far by being a dick back and I get it you probably didn’t have the worst intentions sending me that but you really did put a number on my mood and i’m not gonna lie it irritated me, so I’m sorry, but just understand the way you word things and talk to people really affects the way they treat you in return. anyways that’s it for me. hope you can understand my point of view, but yeah
Text ver of just message & response ——> Click Here
Are My Goals Realistic?
This is obviously one of those things that I can’t possibly answer without including my own biases and so the answer to this question is, well, In my opinion, yes. And to be honest I don’t say that lightly, I understand the process of moving to Japan, getting married, university, finding a job, you name it, is going to be a difficult one. That being said, I’ve done my research and I will continue to do so accordingly, honestly at this point the only thing stopping from going right now is the stupid “pandemic” and borders being closed. That’s a whole nother topic in it of itself though so I will leave that for a different time. Regardless, I think this person probably just skimmed a some posts and the general overview of my site and made some judgements based off that and I can’t necessarily blame him, although I will say his “approach” of giving whatever “advice” he intended to wasn’t what I would consider the best, he still probably had good intentions and didn’t intentionally *try* to come off as a douche, (but he kinda did, at least to me), but I’m not mad or upset at all nor do I hold any personal grudge against the guy, hell I can even understand his argument assuming I DIDN’T plan on going to uni at all (but as mentioned in my response I do), and getting a degree will be an inevitable part of me assimilating into my new life in Japan.
In conclusion I spent WAY too long responding too this guy in all seriousness (lmao), but to be fair I think that there are some really valid points that were made by both of us and maybe something to take away from this as a whole and if not well, hey I hope you at least enjoyed listening to be blabber and get my pantys in a twist over this guys message😂, anyways I’ll meet u guys in the next post.